Understanding and Overcoming Ableism: A Guide
By: Katie McMillan
The one thing that everyone in the world's population has in common is that we are all unique and different. No one on this earth can be duplicated or is a mirror image, physically or otherwise, of another human being. It is everyone's uniqueness that deserves to be recognized, and when it is, society will see that everyone could contribute to the betterment of the world regardless of how they may differ from one another.
Discrimination is defined as the unfair treatment of people based on anything that sets them apart from what society deems "normal." Which could be an unjust criticism of someone’s race, gender, sexual orientation, age, physical appearance, or disability. Discrimination against someone with a disability is referred to as ableism.
Anyone can experience ableism, just like anyone can adopt an ableist attitude. Here are a few things to think about when dealing with ableism within our society, both online and in person.
1. Adjust your reaction to the type of audience that you are receiving these comments from.
First, think about who you’re receiving the ableist comments from. Are they a child? Are they adults? Do they represent a company or organization? For example, if a child makes such a comment, it is probably not due to ignorance but because they are genuinely trying to learn. Children have genuine, natural curiosity. If you feel comfortable, allow them to ask questions; this will help them nourish their growing minds. Parents, however, in this type of situation will often try to deter their child from asking you questions for fear of offending you. Again, if you're comfortable, let them know you're open to their child's curiosity.
Another situation could be an adult using social media and their keyboards to spout ableism. These kinds of people are probably not interested in growing and taking accountability for what they say and do. It's probably a waste of your time to try to educate them. Instead, invest your time and energy in people who show a genuine willingness to understand and learn.
If there is a company that refuses to build a ramp so that people with mobility devices can access their business, that is an opportunity for a discussion so that they can grow and understand that everyone has the right to have access to a business that they wish to access.
Remember that as of 2025, The Accessibility for Ontarians with Disabilities Act (AODA) will require all establishments and businesses to be 100% accessible to the public.
2. Please check in with your own internalized ableism.
For many people within the disability community, ableism played a huge role in their childhood. It's only natural that ableism would become internal; however, we must grow from that. Lean on each other and realize we are not alone. There can be some bullies online who utilize ableism as their weapon to harm us. However, there are just as many, if not more, people we can relate to on any given social media platform, or even in the real world, for that matter. When you feel comfortable, join or reach out to certain disability communities so that you can interact and receive support from like-minded people who experience similar things to you regularly. For example, Facebook groups, internet chats, Twitter, Instagram, etc. You can also use the Internet to connect yourself with social events in the real world. This will help create a sense of bonding and belonging with people who have similar experiences in life. Please also remember that people you trust, including friends and family, are also there to provide support.
3. Never forget to show up for yourself.
Practice self-care. Do things that make you happy. Be patient and kind with your own thoughts and feelings. It's okay to ask for help when you need it. Remember that people's opinions of you are none of your business. You don't owe anyone an explanation. Nothing is more important than your inner peace. It is your right to eliminate anything or anyone from your life that is a threat to that peace. Remember, you are the only YOU that this world is blessed to have.
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Header image (three friends chatting) via PRO bono Australia
Katie McMillan is someone who has lived experience with a disability. Katie has also been an advocate for many years for children, youth, and young adults in similar positions to hers. She has experience directing her own care and has also spent time as a self-care manager on the Direct Funding program. She is passionate about writing and learning new things. She plans to travel soon and see more of the world. She is also very excited to see Whimble soar.
