Traveling with a Disability: The Need for Attendant Care

By: Andrew Gurza

When most people think about traveling on vacation or for work, they envision throwing some things in a suitcase, hopping on a plane and that’s all, right? Simple. Easy. But when you are a physically disabled person who requires attendant care, that quick and easy fantasy becomes a lot harder to imagine.

A couple of weeks ago, my best friend, who is also a wheelchair user, came to visit me for the weekend. We hadn’t seen each other in 3 years, in part because of the global pandemic, but also because neither of us could arrange for an attendant to help us while we traveled. We both felt trapped in our homes because we didn’t have access to outside care. In most supported housing situations, where there are staff that take care of you on-site, it is against policy and protocol to see them outside your home. This makes traveling with them an impossibility. And, since there aren’t currently any on-demand attendant services available (so excited for this app to be a thing!), you end up having to find friends that you think might be comfortable traveling with you and doing you care.

To be honest, this presents a ton of anxiety for me as the person who needs the care. I worry that I am overstepping boundaries by asking friends to help me, and I also worry that they might not be able to do the more complex care I have, like helping me in the bathroom or in the shower. I constantly find myself posing the question, “and how do you feel about helping me in the bathroom?” and then dreading their response, knowing that it might be too much for them. Knowing that I might be too much for them.

I find that when I am traveling with “friendtendants” as I affectionately refer to them, I need to make sure that they feel supported. So, if we are traveling together, I like to make sure they are paid for their time, and that also we split the costs of meals, etc. I do this because I understand that without their help I can’t have these travel experiences at all, and I think that disabled people deserve to have vacations, just like everyone else.

I hate not being able to travel because I need care, and so oftentimes I simply won’t go anywhere because of the uncertainty around who will help me pee once I get off the plane. It makes it hard to book work gigs as a speaker, and it adds another unspoken layer of ableism. Why can’t disabled people hire travel attendants to help them, and why isn’t care something we think about in relation to traveling? It should be.

All of us are going to need attendant care as we begin to experience disability ourselves, and all of us are going to want to sit on a sandy beach somewhere, basking in the sun, not worrying about who is going to help us pee. Let’s make that worry melt away by making travel attendants accessible today.

We’re live in Ottawa! Join our beta here if you’re in the city. For those outside of Ottawa, join the waiting list here so we know where to expand next!

Header image (plane wing in front of sunset) via Shutterstock (Eva Darron)

Andrew Gurza is an award winning Disability Awareness Consultant and the Chief Disability Officer and Co-founder of Bump’n, a sex toy company for and by disabled people.  Andrew uses they/he pronouns and identifies proudly as disabled. Their work has been featured on BBC, CBC, Daily Xtra, Gay Times UK, Huffington Post, The Advocate, Everyday Feminism, Mashable, Out.com, and several anthologies. He was the subject of an award winning National Film Board of Canada Documentary “Picture This”. Andrew has guested on a number of podcasts including Dan Savage’s Savage Love and Cameron Esposito’s Queery. He has spoken all over the world on sex, disability and what it means to be a Queer Cripple. 

He is also the host of Disability After Dark: The Podcast Shining a Bright Light on Disability Stories which won a Canadian Podcast Award in 2021, a Queerty Award and was chosen as an Honoree at the 2020 Webby Awards. The show is available on all platforms. Andrew is also the creator of the viral hashtag #DisabledPeopleAreHot. You can find out more about Andrew by going to www.andrewgurza.com and connecting via social media @andrewgurza1.